PALM BEACH (The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump delivered a scathing review of Joe Biden’s first prime-time White House speech as President, accusing his successor of “assaulting the American people with long words.”

In a statement issued from his home at Mar-a-Lago, Trump ripped Biden for spewing a stream of words that were often three or four syllables.

Reeling off a list of the offensively long words in Biden’s speech, Trump singled out “hyperbole,” “administer,” and “effective.” “This should never be allowed to happen in this country,” he said.

“No one knows what these words mean, and no one will ever know,” Trump said.



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