Pick your favorite!
Okay, well if I had to, it’d be “Soul Food y Adobo.” That track is such a beautiful ode to the power of food to nourish culture, to communicate cultural heritage. How would you say food, and the rituals that surround it, have shaped your sense of community?
I adore my culture. I’m a Caribbean person from New York City, and the cultural aspects of growing up there as a Puerto Rican person are the coolest things in the world to me. I have to poeticize them. You know what I mean? Being Puerto Rican isn’t just about waving a red, white, and blue flag and listening to Jennifer Lopez. I love J-Lo, by the way — I’m her biggest fan — but especially as a nuyorican, you’re like, who am I? What do I actually know about my heritage? And I find every singular detail about my heritage so beautiful, so emotionally moving. It’s the color of the yellow and the red of the bustelo tin can that my grandma has in her cabinet. It’s the fact that we have our own soul food — an African-Carribean based food called criolla. It’s the fried chicken and the rice and the beans, the mondongo and the sopas. It’s the packets of sofrito my grandma rips open, the syrup that the man pours into the shaved ice to make those beautiful triangular piraguas. It’s the juxtaposition of lighting in the car with the windows down on the FDR as your older cousins crack dutches and play Rough Riders. It’s going to Orchard Beach, to City Island, to drink piña coladas and take in the view. It’s being little and everybody’s running out of the pool, because your older cousins are fighting, and somebody got to put on Vaseline and you have no idea what the fuck is going on. It’s seeing all the fly girls walking down the block with their hair done and their jewelry and their nails; it’s a signature beauty.
As a journalist and a photographer, I know what it means to be a fly on the wall. I know what it means to love something so much that you have to follow it and document it. But I don’t like just looking at things, so being a photographer and a journalist couldn’t do it for me. That’s where the poetry comes in. I’m moved to write, to detail everything the way I did in “ABCs of New York”. And so when it comes to cultural heritage, I don’t think I’m a spokesperson at all. I just love where I come from and I love writing about it. I do.
Freedom has been such a big theme in your life and in your music. What does it mean to you now?
Freedom is no fear. Why did I make two albums? I don’t have the fear of sticking to an industry structure of being successful. I don’t fear confusing people with my artwork. I don’t fear what people are going to think of me or say about me because my artwork is a little bit more complex. I don’t care about that no more. I’ve had to spend my whole 27 years of life giving an explanation to people, and I don’t want to do explanations. I make great music that has good intentions behind it and I stand by everything that I make and everything that I’m into. So here, take a little bit of my soul and if you like it, you like it. If you don’t, please move on. I don’t care. Regardless, I’m happy and healthy.
You’ve proven yourself a capable fighter in your music, but also an equally powerful healer. So, I wanted to ask you: How do you heal? Or, to put it another way, What does self-care mean to you?
My self-love comes from my dedication to myself. I can’t rely on nobody but myself and I don’t. I had to learn that at a very early age. And though that sounds kind of cold-hearted and very, very typical of a rapper, I think that’s the greatest thing in the world, because I’m really happy with depending on myself and my self-care. My self-love comes from being my own parent, my own best friend and my biggest cheerleader. My self-love is showing up for myself, showing up for the music, showing up for the studio dates, showing up for these interviews. It’s taking the sluggish, the lethargic, the lazy and making it strategic and powerful. I don’t have it all the way figured out, but I’ve got to tell you, I’ve come a long way. Everything is Beautiful and Everything Sucks are the biggest form of self-love. Despite being tired and worn out, despite feeling broken from being Princess Nokia, I had to show up for myself and do it all over again.
Interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.
Get the best of what’s queer. Sign up for our weekly newsletter here.
