‘My mother-in-law keeps pressuring me to have kids – I don’t think it’s my duty’

A woman has taken to social media to vent her frustrations after her mother-in-law told her to hurry up and give her a grandchild – just two months after she started trying for a baby

Building a family and having children is a life goal for many people, but we all have our own preferences when it comes to if and when we choose to settle down.

And one woman on Reddit has said that while she is ready to start trying for a baby with her husband, her mother-in-law has been making things difficult by piling on the pressure to “give her a grandkid”.

The woman explained she and her husband are in their late 20s to early 30s and had held off on trying for a baby for “personal reasons” until around two months ago.

But her husband’s mother is so eager to become a grandmother that she asks for updates on their fertility journey multiple times a day.

Get the news you want straight to your inbox. Sign up for a Mirror newsletter here.

She wrote: “My husband and I are in our late 20s/early 30s and are wanting to start having kids and have a family. My mother-in-law knows this and keeps on reminding us how excited she is about becoming a grandmother.

“We only started trying to have kids a month and a half ago because of some personal reasons. My mother-in-law knows about this. So, if you do the maths, you know there aren’t many chances of getting pregnant unless you’re very lucky.

“Despite this, my mother-in-law keeps on asking us if we are pregnant yet. We’ve seen each other 4-5 times since we started trying.

“She asked me if I was pregnant two days in a row, and also asked if I’d had my period yet. She asked if we had ‘something to announce’ twice in the same evening.

“And in the past before even trying to have kids, she said: ‘I can’t wait for you to make me a grandkid’. Like we need to make a kid just for the purpose of her becoming a grandparent.”

The woman said her mother-in-law’s questioning is making things harder because she now keeps “stressing out” about not being pregnant.

She eventually told her mother-in-law to stop and insisted it isn’t her “duty” to make her a grandmother.

She added: “All this pressure has been put on us now. I am stressing out because I can feel my mother-in-law is rushing us to have a baby. And it’s only been a month and a half! What if we only get pregnant in a year? Will this questioning last a year?

“I couldn’t take all the questioning anymore especially after it’s been only a month and a half of trying. I asked my husband to tell her to please stop. Husband told her nicely and explained it was too much.

“Thought she would get it, but no. The same evening, she asked me if I was pregnant again! I told her that she needed to please stop asking and that she would be the first to know if we were. I’m not the type to talk back to anyone, so she was shocked and didn’t take it well.

“Give me a break. It’s not my duty to ‘make you a grandkid’.”

Commenters on Reddit offered suggestions to help the woman – including telling her mother-in-law that she’ll stop trying to get pregnant if she keeps pressuring her.

One person wrote: “You’re not a baby factory! I hope your husband can help her see the light. Stressing you out like this certainly isn’t helpful to your body.”

While another said: “Just tell her that every time she asks it’s back on birth control for a month. Keep trying but keep it to yourselves.”

And a third commented: “Tell her each time she asks, you’ll delay trying for another 6 months. You don’t have to mean it, but it might shut her up.”

What do you think? Let us know in the comments below.