A woman has been left “upset” after her family criticised the suit her husband had chosen to wear to a funeral, as they accused him of not being “brought up properly”
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Traditionally, those in mourning have paid respects to their loved ones by wearing black formal attire to a funeral, usually in the form of a suit or a smart dress.
But one mum has found out the hard way that some people have very strict expectations when it comes to funeral outfits, as her own family accused her husband of being “dressed inappropriately” – just because he didn’t have a suit jacket.
According to Birmingham Live, the woman told Mumsnet that she and her husband were attending her grandmother’s funeral on a warm day.
She said: “We recently went to my grandmother’s funeral.
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“My husband has never had to wear a suit for work, so he only has one suit in blue that he wears to weddings.
“For the funeral he wore black suit trousers, white shirt, black tie and black shoes. All ironed, shoes polished, etc. I thought he looked smart and respectful.
“It was a very warm day so no coat.”
But a few weeks later, the woman was contacted by her dad – who accused her husband of being “highly disrespectful” with his outfit choice.
The mum added: “A couple of weeks later my dad said to me that he felt my husband was dressed inappropriately because he wasn’t wearing a full suit.
“He said it was highly disrespectful, that multiple people had commented on it, and the thing that upset me most; he said it showed that my husband hasn’t been brought up properly.
“I was genuinely stunned. I haven’t told my husband as he would be mortified if he knew.
“There we lots of men at the funeral wearing old ill-fitting suits, or jumpers and chinos, which to me looked a lot less smart.”
The woman then asked for advice from other Mumsnet users, who all agreed her dad was being “totally out of order”.
One user wrote: “I think your dad is totally out of order, projecting something.
“Sounds like your husband was dressed fine. I really don’t think it matters what people are wearing at a funeral as long as it’s dark and smart.”
While another said: “Your dad is being very unfair. Your husband was there and was smartly dressed – that’s absolutely fine.”
And a third posted: “Your dad is being highly unreasonable and very rather nasty to say that your husband wasn’t brought up properly.”
However, some users sympathised with the woman’s dad, insisting his comments may have come from a place of grief.
Someone pointed out: “Grief can make people think and say the strangest things. Don’t mention it to your husband and just try not to take it too personally.”
And another person noted: “I really can’t believe anyone has commented on what he wore. Is your dad struggling with his emotions and lashing out at things that he wouldn’t normally?”