That’s a seriously amazing defense mechanism! Which unfortunately is probably called upon more than any of us would prefer these days, given that we all live in a foolish and unjust society. Just keep on wrecking Wile E. Coyote’s day, Aquarians. Gleeful destruction of predatory plans is always a moral and worthy use of your time.
This is the first full season in a while in which Jupiter will not be in your constellation at all, Pisces. That’s not gonna kill you or anything, but after having become accustomed to its presence, you may feel a little bereft. That’s okay! You really need to let yourself feel the fuck out of even seemingly petty changes that affect you personally: holding things back always eventually ends up in a levee-breaking scenario. This is a safe time to feel your feelings. Your ruler Neptune is still accompanying your sign personally, and as always, arrives flawlessly attired: invisible to the unaided human eye from the surface of Earth, no solid surface, and actually physically smaller than similar ice giant Uranus because the gravity of its mass compresses its atmosphere so densely. An ICON!
You, however, do not need to suck in your own mass at such density and distance that you cannot be perceived by the naked human eye. I mean, it sounds tempting! Kind of, but it is A) impossible, and B) unnecessary because Neptune is there to do it for you! Feel your feels, cry it out, go scream into the sky! Neptune can vacuum it up tight for you and never tell another living Earth-bound soul, unless you want to share.
You probably feel crummy right now, Pisces, but will also probably have a good summer.
Aries, you are going to get in a fight. No clue how it will happen, please try not to be the aggressor if you can help it!
In late May, belligerent Mars joins the dalliance of romantic Venus and lucky Jupiter, who have already been mingling over your constellation. Auspicious, right? That’s a lot of personality to host in a single space, but if anyone can pull it off with panache, it’s Aries.
This month, as an Aries, is liable to feel a bit like suddenly being dropped into improv acting in a mid-20th-century set-piece sitcom, rather than simply engaging in your usual contemporaneous social scenarios. Just try to keep it cute; don’t go kicking holes in the décor unless (until!) it becomes necessary.
Damn, Taurus. Your own 2022 season already came at you aggressively with some major celestial movement, and Gemini season continues the trend as retrograde Mercury backs it up through your business from late May to early June before switching step to strut forward over and out of your patch by mid-June. Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on your individual circumstances and tolerance for whatever shenanigans are happening with you and Mercury at the time) your ruler Venus returns to your constellation in late May, bringing romantic feeeeelings along with it.
Don’t feel the need to act impulsively on this instinct — not that you would, and certainly not because you wouldn’t! Just, in this instance, trust your deep-seated resistance to getting up and getting dressed so that you can protect your dignity. It’s an underrated superpower!
Venus will remain with you throughout Gemini season. If new love stuff is going to happen, it’s got plenty of time to get rolling once Mercury gets prograde again in June.
Get the best of what’s queer. Sign up for Them’s weekly newsletter here.
