I love food, but there’s just something extra special about snacks, you know? I’ve always been a snacker and most of the time would rather eat a bunch of snacks — not all unhealthy, thank you — throughout the day rather than actual meals. Normally it’s not too much of an issue, but I recently started working from home full-time, and holy sh*t, all I do is think about snacks. Listen, when you live in a tiny New York apartment and your kitchen is practically in the living room, which doubles as your office, it’s hard to ignore the food that’s RIGHT THERE. Inevitably, I not only snack a lot, but whenever I’m not snacking, I’m thinking about snacking. Sigh. I tried to keep track of many of my snacky thoughts during the day to see how often they’re really coming up, and I’m almost too embarrassed to share them with you. (But I still will.) Join me on this journey.
- What are the odds I can get a few more boxes of Girl Scout cookies? Can I order them? I think I need them.
- OK, if I order groceries now, they won’t be delivered until Sunday, which means I have to make these Oreos last for four more days. So do the math . . . I can eat . . . well I’ll just eat a couple now and figure it out later.
- Note to self: you will not, in fact, figure it out later and instead eat half the pack at once.
- If I leave the box of crackers on the coffee table, they’ll be closer when it’s my designated snack time later, and then I won’t have to get up to get them.
- Well, leaving the crackers on the table means I’ll just eat them all at once, so let’s not do that one again.
- Two pints of ice cream will surely last me through the week. No doubt about it.
- Two pints of ice cream actually lasts two days. Not sure how that happened.
- I think the cats probably want a snack, so I’ll give them treats and then have a cookie too. Seems fair.
- Oh, the cats are sleeping. But now all I can think about is that cookie, so maybe I’ll still have it.
- Cats are awake! They get treats! And I get another cookie!
- If I just eat this apple and peanut butter and some chips, then I probably don’t need to make dinner later.
- There’s only one cookie left in the pack, and it’ll probably be lonely by itself, so I might as well just eat it.
- I’m not even hungry but I KNOW I have a fresh box of Wheat Thins that really need to be eaten.
- What if the freezer breaks and I lose my Ben & Jerry’s? I should probably just finish the pint so I don’t have to worry about it.
- Didn’t I get enough snacks to last the week? It’s Wednesday and I have, like, nothing left.
- I should just buy more snacks for next week. Can never be too careful.
